Arguing that today's version of the Qur’an has been mistranscribed from the original text, scholar Christoph Luxenberg says that what are described as “houris” with “swelling breasts” refer to nothing more than “white raisins” and “juicy fruits.”

Luckily, Luxenbuerg is a fatwa-dodging pseudonym. But nonetheless, his radical (even ridiculous) re-interpretation
of the Qur'an (based on Aramaic not Arabic) seems specifically designed to piss off Islamists.